Birthdays, Birds and Bees ...

The consistent fact about last few posts have been the same opening " Ages since I wrote .....", so I sat musing as to why I don't utilize my "free" moments to pen the interesting happenings on a daily basis? Why does it take all to be piled up in notebooks scribbles, notepad saves to put in words after ages? Why this lethargy? Why move away from something that makes me happy? While these answers continue to elude me, here's some real conversations...

Kids were backseat listening to songs in 103.7 and Hailey and Grey's Starving came up: 

I didn't know that I was starving till I tasted you
Don't need no butterflies when you give me the whole damn zoo

And while I was still blushing backseat banter started.

"Should be chicken, right?" Manav quipped

"Could be broccoli too, can't really say" Arnav answered

So birds and bees have been featuring in our conversations too often now to go unnoticed. The other day Manav said:

"Mommy how can Jimmy Carter the 39th US President be the first to be born in a hospital? Where were the others born?"

"Maybe at home" I said distractedly

"What? How is that possible? Don't you need to cut tummies to get babies out?"

By this time I was alert. Couldn't possibly lie, since now he's older and more roundabout answers will just breed a trust and google-better-than-mom issue.

"Well some babies are born from the body. Don't need to cut open" I said

"What? From the body? Where? That's impossible"

I didn't have the wherewithal to continue this conversation so ably rerouted but am sure that's not the last I heard about that as evidenced by the next round of backseat banter.

"So I know that the sperm and the egg have to meet to form a baby. How do they meet?"

"I will have to tell you later Manav. Have to explain some things and it needs a good time to sit and talk. I am afraid driving and talking about how babies are made won't work well"

He did stop. But time's up, we need to talk. Waiting, prolonging for the perfect moment is just adding to the certainty that he'll get his answers elsewhere and there is no controlling that !!

More questions - "Can you have babies without marriage?"

Arnav answered that one "Well you'll know after you get married”

Manav said " Then I'll never know, because I'll never get married"

Innocence is bubbling away to make place for first traces of big boy we have in our hands. He just turned 10 and my happiness is around the fact that he can now do laundry, dishes, clean up room, etc. but guess there are other information dissemination I have to perform however hard it may seem.

Till then, I can just hope and pray we talk before he reads this !!

Letter from Parents - For Arnav as Star Student

Dear Arnav,

That summer of 2008, we were panicking, your father and I, since you would make your appearance soon and we didn’t have a name for you. This was in stark contrast to your brother, we had his name picked even before we were married!! But then you cannot blame us, we weren’t really expecting you. You’re the proverbial icing on the cake, the unexpected, the surprise, the cherry on the pie, bonus, gift, christmas in summer, I can go on and on, but I digress.

Coming back, yes we were going crazy finding a name. Finally after what seemed like ages, we found it - ARNAV.

Goes well with Manav? Check.

Short and sweet? Check.

People, especially non-Indians can say it fine? Check.

What about the meaning? A big body of water. Check.

Little did we know that time how you would embody your name. A big body of water, a vast ocean, blue sea, peaceful, calm, ready to embrace. Now you know why I always want to steal a cuddle, a hug or even a peck if not a kiss from you. It just calms me down, whatever state I am in, I feel soothed, happy and oh so good.

You are this vastness of compassion and kindness ever ready to share and make others happy. Something that cannot be taught, something that’s so deep within you, something you were born with. Something so precious, but can never be taken away from you.

You will always spread joy and happiness wherever you go. Arnav, you have already lived up to your name, so all we wish for you is:

Go places, meet people, have million friends and give them the gift of feeling loved which I get every moment I am with you. Except for the times you are mad at me and wouldn’t hug me even if I beg and plead. Just like now, when I said “No” to another episode of FLASH.

Love,

Mommy

1/11/2017

 

My Very Own Brother By: Manav Parekh

The most helpful person in my whole life would be my very own little brother Arnav. He helps me when I'm hurt, and plays with me when I'm lonely. I always pay him back in one way or the other. He is the best brother anyone could have.  

I play games with him like chess or sports like tennis and occasionally even soccer or football. When we get into a fight, we get mad at each other. But for some crazy reason after all the commotion and argument .......... we just start LAGHING! We have a lot of fun connecting worlds in Minecraft. We build amazing buildings and obstacle courses . When we get bored of Minecraft we move on to maybe a snack." Delicious" we say as we eat peanut butter sandwiched into two crackers. Then our mom might say "I just took out the clothes out of the dryer. Can you please sort them into piles !" Then its off to laundry sorting we go !

We'd make piles and after we are sure which pile is which we shoot the correct clothes into the correct piles like basketballs. "Score, Score, Score" we'd say and clothes started plopping into the sorted piles of clothes. We get it done in a total jiffy ! Its a win, win, win. We get it done fast, we have fun and its getting work done.

Then its finally time to go to sleep (since we have eaten our meals of breakfast, lunch and dinner already) We walk up the stairs to the room that we share. We brush our teeth and plop down on our beds. We need each other to sleep in different ways. My brother needs me because he reads at night. If you don't tell him to stop he'll read till morning ! I have to tell him to stop reading to finally go to sleep. He helps me because I'm scared of the dark. When I'm frightened I cant sleep but when my brother walks up the stairs with me and in bed says "It's okay" I can sleep without nightmares.

After one of our average days me and my brother make it through. We helped each other to make our day the BEST!

Arnav is TRULY the awesomest brother anyone could ever, ever, have !

         

Catching up and Letting Go

" Is been ages since I wrote...its time ...."

" Write? Of course I want to but where is the time....no time even to die...."

" I think of prose in my head....what I would write if there was a keyboard in front of me....if I wasn't cooking/cleaning/working/driving....."

"If you really really like to do something you'll make time for it...."

Played around with these and many such openings. Settling for this.

Life is good. Yes, as I have known it. Recently I did some reading about the Fermi Paradox and seriously "Where is everybody"? And that led to the realization we are such a tiny speck in the fathomless universe, kind of zoomed out and zoomed in and I stayed where I was. And lo I had the perspective. There were "better" off folks than me there were "worse" off folks than me. Its all relative. Sometimes the "better" and "worse" flips buckets with time. You know what I mean? What was "worse" is now "better" and vice versa. So maybe the dimension I need to always keep in mind is time and "this too shall pass ".....

Ok enough philosophy. Lets get back to conversations. There have been so many interesting ones during dinner. Usually it is the boys babbling between them which is invariably around minecraft or Pokémon. I had refused to be pulled into anything that has video games connotation but soon realized that I cannot shy away from the single most important thing for the boys. So I spent my precious time learning how to play Minecraft and Pokémon. Minecraft seems way easier than Pokémon and I am aware that sheds light on my mathematical abilities. So I will stop there.

Coming back to dinner table conversations. The one that stands out ( I realize there has been way too many dinners since I last wrote) was when Papa and Mommy was super funny and laughing all the time rather than redirecting the boys' focus on eating. They even said you can leave your food on the plate. And I am not telling you what transpired before dinner time to bring out this "best" behavior (from the kids' perspective) in us. That story some other time.

So it was a conversation about names and meanings.

"I have a person in my class named Yaya" Manav said and added " I am not being racist when I say that he is colored"

"You have a person in class named Yaya?" I asked

"Ya" he answered and rolled with laughter

And the other time we went to Walmart and ended up letting the kids buy junk food like pizza and ice cream. They came home and Manav said "Are you sure you're our parents? Sometimes I feel you put on our parents masks and when we sleep you take them off and become aliens. Its scary" So being extra nice when most of the times you're lousy comes with some questions. 

Tough Life .......Shows that I started writing this page an year ago. At least I finished, that's something.

Cosmic Yoga with Darth Vader

This is so scary...I mean its more than a year I have penned anything here. In my mind though I keep spinning the sentences I would write if I were to write and get vicarious pleasure in that. Today I almost forced myself to write. I mean the boys read the posts occasionally and laugh their heads off and repeat things that they find so interesting and that brings in the real pleasure. Plus so much has been happening, they're growing up and every day brings in stories, every moment is worth photographing, framing and jotting down. Alas, cannot do that. And then memory is fragile, fades away and I just cannot remember what was it that made me clutch my tummy and go crazy that Arnav said.

Without further ado let me get to the point. We will go LIFO (Last In First Out). So I was putting the boys to bed. Ripe moment for awesome frame worthy kiddo quotes but invariably I'm the crankiest around that time and all I want Oh God all I want is somehow they lie down and fall asleep. Instead 

"I'm Jedi. And here's my light saber" says Arnav sitting on the bed with his leg raised cradled in his arms - yes the yoga pose and goes on to do some more like hopping dinosaur : forward bend with hands behind ankles and what looked like downward dogs and back bends. Couldn’t catch all the descriptions since he’s babbling at a speed where his speech becomes undecipherable. Once I was able to calm him down he said this is cosmic yoga and they teach this in health class at school.  

The other night Arnav goes – “Hey Mommy”
“Yes baby”
“Can you put me to bed tonight?”
“Sure”
“No not with just hugs and kisses and then you leave. You have to make sure I fall asleep. I have been lying awake all night lately”
Apt to mention that the kids were sick. Some viral fever. And Manav being sick turned in way faster than Arnav.
“Ok. But what happened?”
“Manav doesn’t talk anymore. And then he doesn’t tell me Arnav go sleep. And so I don’t know when to sleep and cannot sleep”
That night I slept with him, made sure he fell asleep then stepped out. I did Manav duties in a different way for 2 nights till he took over. Things are back to normal.
 

Another day Manav goes – “Mommy did you complete your MBA? Are you an MBA?”
“Yes”
Manav hugs me. Aweee he hardly does that on his own accord, I’m surprised.
“You earn more than $50/hr”
“????”
“Well they taught at school that MBAs are the top of the career chart and earn highest.”
Checked the paper after the fact that they were using some charts etc to figure out hourly income, compute monthly income all commensurate to your education level. So many things going on and my boy just reveled in the fact that I was top of the chart. I did feel a wee bit proud of myself too. Too much financial literacy going on as well in third grade.


Have to insert this - So we have plans in summer. Or lets put it this way I have plans for summer. I want the kids to learn Hindi. They know quite a bit, speak broken Hindi but we want to do better than that.
So I said " This summer I'll teach you Hindi. A penny for every Hindi word you say"
"Haan Ji" says Arnav
"Two pennies. Yes that's the way"
He thinks some and then breaks into a song "Dance Basanti" !!!
After the laughter mayhem dies down, he says "Teach us Telegu or Tamil or Gujju"
I was just plain impressed he even knew those languages existed, while conveying my inability to teach those.

There are just way too many things to write in this single post. But I need to call it a night. Tomorrow awaits with don’t-want-to-wake-up kids, bus for school, lunch ,work, thank-god-its-Friday, no not really its chess tournaments till midnight, then sleep in late on Sat, Manav’s birthday party on Sunday that-reminds-me-I-haven’t-ordered-cake and its Monday already !! So long and hope I keep posting. Here's to me and you, will do a happy baby to close it out. Wonder if that was R2D2.

Happy Birthday to me

Yes, that time of the year when I get to hear from all and sundry, often dormant folks from various walks of life brought to life by my brushes with social media, internet, surveys, actuals meetings immortalized by internet and the likes. Even Google had this as google doodle on my birthday:

 

Not to mention the tons of emails I received from websites and stores, most offering me discounts to shop. But this takes the crown:

 

 



Of course I got a ticket and I remember the date coz it was January 2nd 2014 and I was returning early from work driving at 85 mph on George Bush Turnpike listening to....ok don't hold your breath, just NPR. That has been my all time drive favorite. Anyways back to the ticket. Looks like the cop was following me for quite sometime and I was speeding even more. It is imperative I mention that I don't use the rearview mirrors if I don't have to change lanes or take turns so good luck if you're blinking your heads off (literally) behind me to catch my attention. I stopped dead in my tracks after I heard the siren and saw the cop car behind me. Since it was a highway I just pulled on the shoulder. I was amused by 2 things - 1. cop was a lady 2. she was in all cowboy ensemble complete with the hat. Oh and the third thing - this was the first ticket for me in my entire driving history. I will leave you to speculate how many years that might be. Anyways after that there is no meat to the story so will let it be. Defensive Driving was because my husband convinced me that it will keep me away from added insurance cost and also reduce the ticket price. Neither proposition appealed but then he offered taking the test/course as me so I agreed.

Back to Birthday. Yes, I easily get deviated and jump to side stories. And why not, other than random messages it was pretty drab - I mean the birthday. We (me and hubby) did go out to lunch but that is it. Kids made cards and sang songs but that is it. If you're already moving on to reading something else hold on. There is a...yes you guessed it - surprise.

We went on a weeklong spring break vacation to California - Bay Area and SFO on 7th - the day after my birthday. That was way beyond any birthday gift I could have asked for. It was an awesome family time, relaxed, frustrating at times but most of it simply great time. Celebrated with my friends with a girls night out in the city in a pier side restaurant with candy floss and cake and gift too. How girly, more so since I am not mentioning the real stuff here. How do I forget this blog is for the kiddos.

And again in a party with old friends some of whom I was meeting after 22 years. Pretty neat eh. Manav calls them 'your kindergarten friends' and he liked the party since I didn't force him to wear 'puja clothes' which we make them wear in Indian gatherings. He was referring to kurta pajama in case you didn't get it. And then we allowed 'devices' to play with so something tells me he would have gladly traded wearing puja clothes for iPhone. Well at least he was playing, I know of kids in that party who were talking to girl friends at the unearthly midnight hours. iPhone and its various uses - I already have the title for my next post.

 

So in all it was a super duper 2015 birthday. Certainly better than 2014 one where I was working on a school marketing presentation - turning around JCP. Till 2016, I rest my birthday post here,





Franklin

Arnav brought home a stuffed fox and the instructions were he would have to chronicle all activities done with Fraklin the fox. Here is the end product:

We were wondering if Franklin ever took a bath and where all he has been with all these kids :-) Whatever happened to the school's sense of hygiene?